The funeral of my mother is already two days ago. It is kinda weird, but it seems that life it picking itself up again. Of course thoughts are still very often with her, but the normal everyday things started to be addressed again.
The funeral itself went exactly the way it was planned. It was not very crowded, but that is the way it was meant to be and more or less after the wish of my mother.
There was a lot of symbolism during the funeral, this done in a very pleasant way so everyone could use it in his or her own way, no matter religion or beliefs.
Personally I liked it that it was not a Catholic funeral. So no service in a church, no incense, no mortuary cards (or “bidprentjes” as the are called in Dutch. Some folks even collect those!). This after the wish of my mother. Specially in the last part of her life she felt very distant from the Catholic church.
During the funeral the sun was shining brightly. That added to the feeling that all was good this way.
After the funeral we brought the flowers to the place where now 14 years ago the ashes of my father were scattered. In 6 weeks the ashes of my mother will be scattered on the same place. Even with my strong believe in that there is not something as an afterlife, this feels good to me.
In my living room I have two display cases. One filled with things that are precious to me. The golden watch of my father was already in there. Now the watch of my mother is now laying beside the one of my father. This was the only thing that I really liked to have and my brother arranged that its now in my possession.
It is only logical that by all the thoughts, conversations you have, things you see and touch that many stories come up again. And one still makes me grin…
I remember that my mother had to stay at the hospital in the city of Enschede because her heart was giving her problems again.
I visited her as often as I could. And during one of my visit I bought this little pot with a nice looking snowdrop (or “Sneeuwklokje” as they are called in Dutch). My mother really liked and was happy with it.
Many visits later I walked in and noticed how my mother poured a little water from a glass into the pot with the snowdrop. I asked her what she was doing and she answered that she was giving the snowdrop some water as she did every day. She proudly remarked that the little plant was still looking so very healthy and that it was still blooming…
With a big grin on my face I said to my mother: “Yes mom, it is still looking very well…. but.. erhmm… mom… It is fake, the snowdrop is made of plastics and fabrics!!!” I will never forget the expression on my mothers face….
The little “fake” snowdrop is now standing on a bookcase in my house.
Lets remember the good things and nice memories. Only those are important!
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Note: On the articles concerning the passing away of my mother I turned off the possibility to add comments to the article. If you want to say something, please write me a mail. Thanks.